Under the Toronto Sun: Friday

Showing posts with label Friday. Show all posts

Friday, August 30, 2019

Day 52: I’m gonna be a millionaire

Between You, Me and the Lamp Post

Day 52: I’m gonna be a millionaire

It’s Friday. That means Lotto Max day and I just bought a ticket for tonight’s drawing. The jackpot … $50 million.

I have a good feeling about the drawing. More than a good feeling, I feel confident that lady luck is smiling at me. Then again, I had the same feeling last week.

I bought a Lotto Max ticket, and as I walked home the song on my phone played ‘I want it all’ by Queen. All the way home, I had that song playing in my head … I want it all, I want it all, I want it all, and I want it now!’ I did want it all, and I did want it now.

Unfortunately, I didn’t get anything.

This week is different though. I think this week I stand an excellent chance of winning. They say shards bring luck and there have been shards this week. First, I cut my finger on a broken glass, and then yesterday Greyson did his bit.

It was an evening like any other evening, Dieter and I worked on our computers while Halley and Greyson raced laps around the house. Occasionally they would make a pit stop to catch their breath, only to switch on their turbo and start up again.

Suddenly there was a loud crash and while Halley dived under the nearest bed, Greyson came charging into the living room, Dieter and I flew out of our seats like to perfectly synchronized athletes.

At first, we didn’t see anything wrong, but when we checked the bathroom … ah yes, there we found the porcelain toilet holder in pieces.

If I was to guess, I would say that during the race Grayson’s backside fishtailed causing the rug in the hallway to hit the bathroom door. The door must have hit the toilet roll holder causing the toilet roll holder to make contact with the ceramic tiles on the bathroom wall. Either way, the toilet roll holder was no more.

So between my broken glass and Greyson’s broken toilet roll holder, there have been plenty of shards and thus I think I stand an excellent chance of winning the Lotto Max jackpot.

I do wonder about these Lotto games though. There’s Lotto 6/49, Lotto Max, Daily Grand, Ontario 49, Lottario, Poker Lotto, Wheel of Fortune Lotto, Megadice Lotto, and a few more and yet I’ve never met anyone who has won anything any of significance. So where are all those lucky players?

Personally, I’ve been playing for 21 years. Isn’t it time that my ship finally came in? I could do so much good with some extra cash. I’m not gonna say if I win the lottery, I’m gonna say when I win the lottery and tonight is the night.

Friday, November 25, 2016

Black Friday

Intrepid souls all over north America, and perhaps elsewhere too, are whipping out their credit cards and heading to the stores for Black Friday bargains.

Others, who prefer to do their shopping online, fire up their computers and prepare for a day of Internet surfing, looking for deals.

I won’t be doing either.

It started out so innocently. I had noticed a red swelling on my leg (where the leg meets the tummy) on Monday. I assumed it was some sort of an insect bite and that it would go away in due time.

This was not the case. If anything the swelling got bigger and became rather painful. So painful in fact that I had to cut my underwear as the elasticized material was too tight around the leg where the swelling was.

Yesterday, I decided I couldn’t wait any longer. Not only had the swelling grown from the size of a blueberry to a cherry, I couldn’t keep cutting my underwear.

The doctor diagnosed the red swelling as a boil, a giant boil. He suggested antibiotics or opening the boil to drain the blood and pus. He was going to give the affected area a local anesthetic, but he said and I quote “I’m not gonna sugarcoat it, it’s gonna hurt.”

He was right. When the needle entered the skin it was just a tiny pinprick, but as soon as he started injecting the freezing liquid it felt like the boil caught fire.

The surgery itself was painless, although more complicated than the doctor had anticipated. He had to cut three times. Eventually, he had to give up because he said he couldn’t cut any deeper because he might hit an artery.

He said that by Sunday the boil should be better, if not I will have to take antibiotics (which I rather not). He advised me to apply warm compresses every two to three hours and stay off my feet.

“So no Black Friday shopping,” I asked him.

“Better not,” he said, “put up your feet and rest.”

This ruined my plans for early Christmas shopping. I was gonna go to the mall, and even though dealing with a crowd of shoppers would be hell, I was prepared to put up with it for the sake of finding some bargains.

If I couldn’t walk the stores, I figured I might as well join the Internet shoppers and go online. Not that that worked out well. Not only did I get for all selected items the message “May arrive after Christmas”, the shipping and handling charges were outrages.

I was about to give up when I found an email in my inbox that a particular website offered 75% off on over 10,000 items. I clicked to check it out, only to be disappointed again.

Items that were $120 were now $115, items that $45 were now $43, items that were $14 were now $12. Where was the 75% off?

So I gave up and my Christmas shopping will have to wait until December. With any luck, the stores in the mall will have Christmas specials. And yes, dragging my purchases home won’t be easy, but it will be cheaper than the shipping charges.

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Friday, September 18, 2015

Friday is Cat Day - Is Cheese Good for Cats

Is your cat or dog a beggar? I’ve had cats all my life and never was there a beggar in the family. Until now. Holly has turned begging into an art form.

She never begs when I have my breakfast or dinner, but come lunchtime she positions herself near to me and looks at me.

When I ignore her, she shifts position, letting me know … “Hello, I’m here. How much longer is this going to take?”

When I’m eating something that I know is not good for cats, she can look at me all she wants, I won’t budge, but if I have something that cats can eat I (eventually) give in.

And Holly knows this. She knows that if she gazes at me long enough, something will come her way.

And this is exactly what happened on Wednesday, with regretful results.

I was eating a sandwich with cheese. Holly was sitting on the floor, looking at me, begging me with her eyes to give her a piece. So I did. Followed by another piece, and another piece and another.

Everything was fine, until the next day. Holly vomited in the morning, again around lunch, and three more times throughout the day. I felt so sorry for the poor thing. She kept to herself in my bedroom, she didn’t respond to anything, even went hiding under my bed.

I came close to calling the vet when I suddenly remembered her eating cheese the previous day, so I Googled “Is cheese good for cats”. Turns out, it isn’t. Cats are lactose intolerant. While kittens might enjoy watered down milk, grown cats should not be given milk, nor cheese, or any type of dairy.

Fortunately, it was just a 24-hour thing and no visit to the vet was required. Yesterday Holly was back to her usual self: lounging on my bed, chasing flies, talking to the walls, and all those other kitty things.

Goes to show though, we might love our cats, and have their best interest at heart, but sometimes we make mistakes. So, when in doubt, don’t do it or research it.

Friday, September 4, 2015

Friday is Cat Day- A Day in the Life of Holly

Every cat owner thinks his or her cat is the most beautiful, the friendliest and the most intelligent creature.

I’m no different. On several occasions, I’ve sang my cats’ praises. Holly’s in particular, as she is such an affectionate, smart and talkative cat. We'll get to the others later, but today it's Holly's day.

Just over two years old, Holly isn’t like any of the others. While Mickey, Chanel, Charlotte and Gabriel are content to merely sleep on my bed, Holly goes to sleep with her head on my pillow.

When Dieter gets up at 6:00 a.m. she joins him in the bathroom. On the rare occasion that he closes the door before she has a chance to follow, she meows (loudly) to be let in. When Dieter opens the door, she gives an appreciative krrr.

While he showers and brushes his teeth, she waits patiently knowing that he completes his grooming routine by combing his hair, at which time Holly wants her hair combed too.

When I get up, she comes with me to the bathroom too and sits on the mat while I shower. As I step out of the shower, she moves to the toilet seat from where she watches me intently as I brush my teeth and wash my face.
She knows what comes next … I comb her head. I deliberately say “head” because I don’t comb her whole body, just the top of her head and her cheeks.

On the rare occasion that she doesn’t make it into the bathroom, she waits for me outside and insists on having her head combed there.

After breakfast I do the dishes and make the beds and Holly comes to “help”. Have you ever tried making a bed where a cat rolls around on it, makes a dive for the sheets, or chases every move you make? Most of the time I just give up and wait for Holly to go the sleep to complete the job.

During the day there’s not much action. Holly will take a nap on the balcony, keep an eye on the fishes, or do whatever to entertain herself.

The strange thing is though, Holly can be seemingly fast asleep, but if I move to go to the kitchen, the bedroom or the bathroom, she gets up and comes with me. She doesn’t watch where she walks either. While putting one paw in front of the other, she looks up, at me, and yet she never bumps into a wall or door.
Another thing I should mention is that Holly is a very talkative cat. She has a large vocabulary with which she expresses herself, she’s even been known to “sing”. If she wants attention, and she doesn’t get it, she will start to serenade us, loud and insistent which will either result in one of us playing with her or an annoyed “Holly, enough already!” In which case she will grow quiet and sulk.

Which bring us back to bedtime. Holly might be fast asleep somewhere, but when she hears the TV being switched off and the computer powered down, she’ll get up and follow me to the bedroom.

Friday, August 14, 2015

Friday is Cat Dat - Sink Appeal

Most cats are afraid of water,

yet the kitchen or bathroom sink holds a magical appeal.

Charlotte ...

Tap water is so much better from the tap than from a bowl.

Gabriel ...

the dishes will have to wait.

Mickey ...

Unidentified stationary objects

Mickey ...

Don't even think of opening that tap

Chanel ...

I don't care for sinks, I prefer the top of the fridge

Holly ...

I don't care for sinks either, I prefer the inside of the fridge.

But where did all the food go?

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Friday, July 31, 2015

Friday is Cat Day - Sleeping Positions

I ADMIT, IT'S A LITTLE SNUG, BUT I CAN MAKE IT WORK.

A TOILETROLL IS A LITTLE CONTROVERSIAL, BUT IT'S BETTER THAN NOTHING.

THIS IS GOING TO GIVE ME A CRICK IN MY NECK.

THIS BOX ISN'T BIG ENOUGH FOR THE BOTH OF US.

I DON'T KNOW ABOUT YOU, BUT I'M COMFY.

Thursday, July 23, 2015

Friday is Cat Day - Talking cats

It is generally accepted that dogs bark and cats meow. But if that is the case, my lot didn’t get the memo. I have five cats and not one of them knows how to utter a proper meow.

Chanel has plenty to say, but when she opens her mouth she sounds more like a frog than a cat. Chanel has no clue of course and happily babbles along.

Mickey is a very quiet cat, but if he does decide to start a conversation he sounds like a bird, a very tiny bird. There are also occasions that he seems to suffer from laryngitis … he opens his mouth, but no sound comes out.

Charlotte doesn’t say much either. Days can go by without her saying anything at all. When she does “meow” she sounds like a sheep, a very tired sheep.

Gabriel has his ups and downs. There are days that he lets himself be heard, and then there are days that he sulks. I can tell when he’s in one of his moods. When he does “meow” he turns the occasion into a serenade. He sounds so pitiful it would melt a stone heart.

Holly has plenty to say, usually between 10:00 and 11:00 p.m. She talks to the walls, she talks to the doors, she talks to the fireplace … we are convinced she sees things we don’t. When Dieter goes to bed at 11:00 he shushes her with a stern “Holly, be quiet”, to which she promptly replies with a string of protests. Every so often she parks herself next to his bed and talks to the nightstand.

So no, our cats don’t meow. Perhaps we should adopt a sixth cat, one who knows a proper meow and who can show this lot who it’s done.

Friday, July 17, 2015

Friday is Cat Day - I'm ready for my close up

Unlike people, cats are very photogenic. To take a good picture, they don't have to select the right outfit, do their hair and put on makeup. They're perfect, even if they just got out of bed.