Friday is Cat Day - Talking cats

It is generally accepted that dogs bark and cats meow. But if that is the case, my lot didn’t get the memo. I have five cats and not one of them knows how to utter a proper meow.

Chanel has plenty to say, but when she opens her mouth she sounds more like a frog than a cat. Chanel has no clue of course and happily babbles along.

Mickey is a very quiet cat, but if he does decide to start a conversation he sounds like a bird, a very tiny bird. There are also occasions that he seems to suffer from laryngitis … he opens his mouth, but no sound comes out.

Charlotte doesn’t say much either. Days can go by without her saying anything at all. When she does “meow” she sounds like a sheep, a very tired sheep.

Gabriel has his ups and downs. There are days that he lets himself be heard, and then there are days that he sulks. I can tell when he’s in one of his moods. When he does “meow” he turns the occasion into a serenade. He sounds so pitiful it would melt a stone heart.

Holly has plenty to say, usually between 10:00 and 11:00 p.m. She talks to the walls, she talks to the doors, she talks to the fireplace … we are convinced she sees things we don’t. When Dieter goes to bed at 11:00 he shushes her with a stern “Holly, be quiet”, to which she promptly replies with a string of protests. Every so often she parks herself next to his bed and talks to the nightstand.

So no, our cats don’t meow. Perhaps we should adopt a sixth cat, one who knows a proper meow and who can show this lot who it’s done.