Day 86: Fifty Shades of rubbish

Between You, Me and the Lamp Post

Day 86: Fifty Shades of rubbish

The writer’s group I belong to is a constant source of inspiration. One of its members, Isaac F., posted a question regarding Fifty Shades. A string of comments followed, but the bottom line is … Fifty Shades was published because the writer knew someone in the publishing world who owed her a favor.

I can’t give you my opinion on the book, because I didn’t bother reading it, but I found this online …

Thanks to my ever-useful Kindle search function, I have discovered that Ana says "Jeez" 81 times and "oh my" 72 times. She "blushes" or "flushes" 125 times, including 13 that are "scarlet," 6 that are "crimson," and one that is "stars and stripes red." (I can't even imagine.) Ana "peeks up" at Christian 13 times, and there are 9 references to Christian's "hooded eyes," 7 to his "long index finger," and 25 to how "hot" he is (including four recurrences of the epic declarative sentence "He's so freaking hot."). Christian's "mouth presses into a hard line" 10 times. Characters "murmur" 199 times, "mutter" 49 times, and "whisper" 195 times (doesn't anyone just talk?), "clamber" on/in/out of things 21 times, and "smirk" 34 times. Christian and Ana also "gasp" 46 times and experience 18 "breath hitches," suggesting a need for prompt intervention by paramedics. Finally, in a remarkable bit of symmetry, our hero and heroine exchange 124 "grins" and 124 "frowns"... which, by the way, seems an awful lot of frowning for a woman who experiences "intense," "body-shattering," "delicious," "violent," "all-consuming," "turbulent," "agonizing" and "exhausting" orgasms on just about every page.

Another writer made the following statement. 

E.L. James, a frumpy little housewife decided one day that she would write a book. By way of research, she found an erotica book, watched a porn movie, and then set to work.

When she was finished she took her work to a publisher who promptly accepted it.

Other writers when they think their work is ready for publication generally have their work proofread and edited. Next, they create a synopsis and a sales pitch. Then they contact one or several literary agents and hope for their work to be accepted. Unfortunately, before that happens, the writer might get one or several rejection letters.

Under no circumstances does a writer ever contact a publisher directly because all of them, at least the respected ones, do not accept unsolicited manuscripts. The writer has to go through a literary agent.

E.L. James had to do none of this. She went straight to a publisher and for some reason, her work was accepted.

She might have sold millions of books and her work might have turned into a movie, but did she gain respect … of course not, she became a laughing stock. Everywhere the book gets slammed and as for the movie … even the cast thought it laughable.

Personally, I think it’s sad and infuriating that such rubbish got published. Writers the world over do their best to produce a good story. They think, they write, they toil for hours to find the right words and tone, they research, and they rewrite their work over and over to reach near perfection.

When they submit their work to a literary agent they get rejected over and over and over again. Some take it in their stride and refuse to give in, others get discouraged and give up.

Fifty Shades was utter rubbish and was published, your manuscript might be beautifully written, but might be buried in obscurity.

https://www.mhpbooks.com/fifty-shades-of-grey-now-officially-rubbish/

https://truelovedates.com/5-reasons-50-shades-of-grey-is-trash/

Day 85: NaNoWriMo Project

Between You, Me and the Lamp Post

Day 85: NaNoWriMo Project

Anyone doing the NaNoWriMo project? It’s my first time and I’m not sure how I feel about it. Not only do I find it difficult to write on command but writing 50,000 words in one month seems like a daunting task.

We’re eleven days into the project and after a little over 22,000 words, my inspiration is failing me. As I said, I don’t do well writing on command.

When I sit down to write, I stare at my laptop screen and wonder what to say. I type a sentence and delete it. I write another and that one too gets rejected. However, let me start house chores, take a walk, sit in a coffee shop or lie in bed and the ideas come storming into my head.

I remember the day when I started my first novel ‘Waiting for Silverbird’.

I was at work, typing a manual for a military tank when I suddenly got this idea for a story. I started writing and the words flowed effortlessly onto the electronic paper. By the end of the day, the first chapter was completed.

Another thing that I don’t particularly like about the NaNoWriMo project is that at the end of November, writers are supposed to put their work online. This makes me wonder … what if someone sees my work and thinks … that’s a good idea. I can make it my own and make it better.

From what I understand, publishers don’t necessarily have to like a manuscript (they have editors to make the story better), but they have to like the idea, something original and that will sell.

Coming up with something original isn’t easy, it’s almost impossible. Look around at the local library, thousands of books about love, war, aliens, monsters, vampires, murderers, etc.

I can’t be sure, but I think for my new novel I have come up with something original. I’ve never read anything like it before, but then, I haven’t read every book that’s out there. Still, I feel confident about the story and as such, I feel a little hesitant putting it on NaNoWriMo for all to see.

Of course, everyone thinks that their story is the best, that they have a fish on the line that will mean their breakthrough into the publishing world. But what if that doesn’t happen? What if nobody wants to publish the book?

Those who have been published by respected publishing houses will say to keep going, to never give up. Every single one of them will tell you how they contacted literary agents and publishers and received one rejection letter after the other. But eventually found success.

I’ve been through the process a few times myself and I can tell you, it’s hard keeping your spirits up when one rejection letter follows another. For starters, it takes time and effort to contact literary agents. Then, there’s a waiting period. Some take only a matter of days to get back to a writer, others take a few weeks. 

Whenever I saw a reply from an agent in my inbox, I got my hopes up. Was this it? Did I finally find someone who was willing to take a chance on me? It never was. Eventually, I gave up.

Now it’s the NaNoWriMo project. Me, along with a few thousand others, are thinking and typing as if our lives depended on it. From what I understand a few writers have been discovered through the NaNoWriMo project. This time, I’m not giving up.

Day 18: Writing – Is self-publishing a good idea?

My Project: 365 Creative Writing Prompts Write something about writing

Day 18: Writing – Is self-publishing a good idea?

Writers are notorious procrastinators. When an idea for a novel is shiny and new they are filled with enthusiasm and scribble (or type) with fire in their hearts and in their fingers, but as time marches on and chapters fail to materialize they’ll use any excuse not to write.

It’s too cold, it’s too hot, they’re tired from working all day, the house needs cleaning, the lawn needs mowing ... you name it and they’ll use it.

Some of them, with every intention to write, sit down and fire up their computer only to stare at the screen or keyboard. From there they’re just minutes away of getting up to make a cup of tea, take the dog for a walk, play with the cat, or do something else that for one reason or another can’t wait.

Me, I’ve given up on novel writing. I wrote and self-published three novels and two children’s books and while I have a forth novel in the making, it’s gathering dust. I just don’t have the motivation anymore to continue writing.

I tried reading a few self-published works and they were bad. Not just bad, they were awful and I thought ... is my work as bad as theirs? No wonder self-publishing has such a bad reputation. So, if and when I decide to continue to write on my fourth novel, I will try to find a literary agent and if I fail, I will shelf the project. If they don’t think it’s good enough, if nobody wants it, then it obviously isn’t good enough for publication.

Every day I see self-published writers promoting their work, tooting their horn about how good, unique or interesting their book is. And I wonder ... did these people even try to find an agent/publisher? If they spend half as much time trying to get published mainstream as they do trying to convince readers to buy their book, maybe, just maybe their work might have been picked up by an agent.

Other than the content of those self-published books, the covers bother me equally. All too often I see book covers with half naked men, showing off their pecks, muscled arms and iron board flat stomachs. Is this what is supposed to make me buy a book? Do these self-published writers think that because some guy is on the cover I’m going to like the story they’ve written?

Other books sport such a plain and boring cover that I don’t even give them a second look. I’m sure you’re familiar with the saying ‘You can’t judge a book by its cover’ ... but this is total baloney. If this saying was true, then why do not all books have white covers with black lettering or black covers with white lettering?

Fact of the matter is, book covers are important, they are very important. You should see how publishers agonize over the right cover for a book. The picture, the colors, the title, the font of the lettering ... idea after idea is presented and rejected until the right combination is found.

While I understand that writers are proud of their work, I don’t like them bragging about it or announcing how many copies they’ve sold or their Amazon rank.

In comparison, I’m reading ‘The Alchemist’ now and what I liked about this author right away is that he was honest enough to state in his foreword that when ‘The Alchemist’ was first published it was a flop. The book didn’t sell, and his publisher canceled his contract. By sheer coincidence the book found another publisher and this time it was a success.

Something that always strikes me when I read a book is that the author has several people to thank. People who helped them in their research, people who supported them and pushed them to keep going, people who read the first draft of a manuscript and suggested changes, and most noteworthy of all, they thank their editor.

A good editor is worth his weight in gold. He will take an ordinary story and make it good, he will a good story and make it brilliant. This and the above mentioned is precisely what self-published writers lack ... they don’t have someone to read their manuscript and give them honest feedback. Writers invariably have fragile feelings and don’t take well to criticism. In turn, family and friends often don’t dare to voice their true opinion.

While there are undoubtedly good self-published books out there, the majority of those I have tried to read should never have seen the light of day.

Feel free to comment. I’d love to hear from you.

www.connymanero.weebly.com

Selling books

I noticed a post on Facebook today that stated that for a literary agent to show an interest in a self-published book, the author should be able to present sales figures of around 20,000 copies.

I have news for that literary agent … if I can sell 20,000 copies of my books, I don’t need her services. 

Let’s face it, some books fly off the shelves, because of the name of the author while others gather dust because the author is a nobody.  Does that make the books of the big name authors any better … I doubt it.  I’m sure there are excellent self-published novels, while some stories of name authors never should have been printed.

Take J.K. Rowling latest effort for instance.  To say that it gets mixed reviews is putting it mildly.  Some critics rave about her writing abilities, others are less than enthused.  Fact is, A Casual Vacancy was a best seller before it was even available.  Proof that readers care about a name, not a story.

Personally I don’t put much stock in what critics have to say, I’d like to see for myself. 

On the one hand A Casual Vacancy is brilliantly written.  Rowling paints the picture of a cute little town and strips away all the veneer to show its inhabitants in all their disgusting glory.  The question is … do readers want to be confronted with such reality?

The story holds an “interesting” variety of characters, but there’s nothing likeable about them.  I don’t know about you, but if I don’t like certain characters I don’t care about  them, and if I don’t care about them why would I want to know what happens to them?  Why would I 

care about:

A heroin addict

A teenage town whore

Two perverted boys

A man who is abusive to his wife and children

A wife who is a doormat

In my opinion, if a nobody had written A Casual Vacancy, nobody would have shown any interest.  But because the book is of the hand of the great J.K. Rowling it turns into a bestseller. 

But back to self-published books.  What they mainly lack is good P.R.  If nobody knows about the book, how is it ever going to sell?  Robin mentions a few interesting strategies in her blog post http://robintidwell.wordpress.com/2012/10/24/selling-books/?utm_source=twitterfeed&utm_medium=facebook

  

Meetups, writers’ groups, book clubs, volunteer organizations. All of these are places to meet people, talk to people, and mention your book.

Good advice Robin, but who has that kind of time?  Most people have jobs and when they come home there cooking and cleaning to be done.

Send a review copy to your local stores. If they see it, in their hands, and look at it, they might take a chance on you.

Another good idea, but here’s the thing.  I did that and was greeted with a lot of enthusiasm, until the store owner found out that my book was self-published and suddenly I was cold product.

In suburbs where book stores are privately owned a self-published author might have a chance, but where I live (Toronto) the book industry is monopolized by Chapters Indigo and they won’t touch a self-published author with a ten foot pole.

Organizing book signings is a tricky situation.  Let’s say that an author does manage to get a signing, he needs to invest in a certain quantity of his work.  That requires not only financial resources but a car.  Have you ever tried to lug around + 50 books?  If they sell, great, if not you’re a few hundred dollars out of pocket.

It all comes down to money.  If you have money you can enlist the help of a P.R. firm, you can stock your own books and you can devote all your time to blowing your own horn.  If you don’t have money … well, you’re pretty much on your own.

Still, I’ll take some of your advice and I’ll let you know what happens.

http://www.guardian.co.uk/books/2012/sep/27/jk-rowling-the-casual-vacancy-review-roundup

Is what's good for the goose really good for the gander?

Tonight I followed a conversation about whether or not to offer constructive criticism on a manuscript.  Some recommended being brutally honest.

I tend to disagree.  Everybody has different tastes and as such a different opinion.  You may like a sweet and sappy story, someone else may hate it.  You may like a murder mystery and think ‘the bloodier the better’, someone else might prefer something a little more subtle.  So criticizing someone’s work should always be done with extreme caution.

Take into account that this person has worked on his manuscript for weeks, maybe even months.  It started with an idea, through bouts of inspiration it took shape, with hard work and perseverance it was finished. 

Since finding a literary agent or publisher is extremely difficult, the author then proceeded to self-publish, because he’s proud of his work and feels he has something to share. 

Having read hundreds of books and followed several critiques, I can honestly say that I put no stock whatsoever into what a critic has to say.  What he gives is his opinion of the book, which may or may not be the opinion of the general public. 

The same with movies and plays.  How often have you read a raving review about a movie and were thoroughly disappointed when you saw it yourself?  By the same token, how often have you seen a movie the critics slammed, and loved it?  There is simply no accounting for taste.

Keep in mind that even J.K. Rowling had to take a certain amount of criticism and rejection when she approached literary agents and publishers with the first Harry Potter book.  Whether you like or dislike the Harry Potter series … today J.K. Rowling is richer than the queen of England.  Can you say as much?

Other than that, authors are only as good as their editors.  Open any book and read the acknowledgements, each and every author will thank her editor(s).  They are the ones who read the original work, slashed unnecessary details and advised what should be expanded upon. 

But even with an editor’s help, a book sometimes is not all that it could or should be.  Take “Duma Key” from Stephen King for instance.  In general people rave about Stephen King.  I only read 35 pages on “Duma Key” and tossed it.  In those 35 pages the main character did nothing but swearing and shouting.  Okay, so he was angry.  Mr. King didn’t have to devote 35 pages to that emotion, I understood the man anger in one or two pages.  Couldn’t King’s editor have advised him to slash 33 pages?

In the end it’s all about personal choice.  What’s good for the goose is not necessarily good for the gander.  If you have to offer criticism, think before you speak.  How would you like to hear someone trash your work?