Day 49: Why do we lie

Between You, Me and the Lamp Post

Day 49: Why do we lie

If you’re like most people, you can’t really function without your morning cup of coffee. I’m no different. When I get to work, I switch on my computer, unpack my bag, and then go down to Tim Hortons for a double-double and a croissant.

I was standing in line behind a woman with a baby in a stroller. When two other women joined the line one of them purred “Oh what a cute baby.” The women got into a bit of a conversation ... what is the baby’s name? How old is she? Etc.

When the woman with the baby left the two women behind me started whispering among themselves. “Did you see that kid? That baby had the nose of a pig. And did you see that rash? OMG, I wonder what that was all about.”

I couldn’t believe my ears. Moments earlier that had complimented the woman on her beautiful baby, and now they were criticizing it left, right and center.

I find in general, people are just saying what the other person wants to hear. For instance ...

Yesterday, a woman posted a picture of herself with her new hairdo. The caption read ‘My new do for my upcoming birthday.’ The picture was horrible. It showed a woman, clearly in her 50s with dark lank hair hanging well below her breasts.

There were a string of compliments from her friends and I thought ... are these people blind? I also wondered what the really thought. Did they really mean that she looked beautiful, or did they think that she look in a mirror and rethink her do?

Well-meaning, I passed on a piece of advice that a stylist had given me many years ago. He stated that women of a certain age shouldn’t wear their hair long, it makes them look old and tired.

To prove his point, he showed me some before and after pictures of women in their 40s, 50s, and 60s. 

The transformation was astonishing. With long hair, these women looked indeed tired, while with a shorter do they looked fresh and years younger.

When I repeated the stylist’s comment to the women, I was criticized and called a bitch. Strange, I thought. When the stylist said this to me, I wasn’t offended. Why is it so hard for people to accept the truth? And why do some people lie?

While I like long hair as much as the next person, take a look around you. Look at the women with long hair and the women with short hairstyles. The women with short styles invariably come up tops. They look younger than their years, fresh, and sophisticated.

My comment to the soon birthday women wasn’t meant to be mean, but rather as honest and realistic.

Unfortunately, all too often I see false flattering comments. The other day I saw an overweight woman in a skin-tight, cream-colored bodysuit. It clung to her every curve and gave the impression that she was naked. Her friends told her how sexy she looked. Sexy? She was by no stretch of the imagination sexy, from behind it looked two piglets were having a fight in her pants.

Then there are those women who think that a bra is a luxury item. They go out in the flimsiest of tops, with boobs that look like their doing the foxtrot underneath the top. Going braless might be fine for women under 30, with an A cup bra size, but anyone on the other side of 30, with a B size or more, should really wear something supporting when going out.  

When everyone compliments each other, how will we know what is the truth and what is a lie? 

  

Day 18: An oil to grow/regrow hair

Between You, Me and the Lamp Post

Day 18: An oil to grow/regrow hair

In my previous post, I recommended onion juice for beautiful hair. I had read several articles on the subject and couldn’t wait to try this out.

I had a problem though … I didn’t have a juicer. I tried getting juice from an onion with a hand citrus press, but that didn’t work at all. So, I visited an online store and ordered a juicer.

Before the juicer was even delivered, I met a girl at work with the most gorgeous hair that skimmed her thighs. Long, soft waves, and silky to the touch. What did she use?

“Mustard seed oil,” she said. “Ever since I was little my mother rubbed mustard seed oil in my hair.”

When I mentioned onion juice to her, she nodded. She was familiar with onion juice, but it irritated her scalp. Mustard seed oil was better. When I asked her where I could find this mustard seed oil she replied that it is available everywhere.

I wasted no time. Like a bow from an arrow, I made my way to Longo’s. Longo’s is a sort of delicatessen store and has all sorts of herbs, spices, and oils. When I couldn’t find the oil on any of the racks I asked one of the sales ladies, but she wasn’t familiar with this type of oil. She, in turn, consulted the store manager but he didn’t know either. “Try Drug Market,” I was told.

So off I went to Drug Market. Instead of wasting time prowling the aisles, I talked to one of the sales clerks and he said that they didn’t stock that type of oil. “Try a health store,” he said, “they might carry this oil.”

However, the health store couldn’t help me either. They had at least 30 oils, but mustard seed oil wasn’t one of them.

So, there was only one thing left to do … go back to the office, go on the computer and order the oil online. Within minutes I found what I was looking for.

According to reviews, the oil has a rather pungent smell, but it works like a charm on hair. Well, that was fine with me. I can put up with a strong smell as long as it gives results.

Using the oil is dead simple. Gently massage a few drops of the oil onto the scalp. For dry hair, bleached hair or hair that regularly gets exposed to a blow dryer or straightener, the oil can also be used from root to tip. Leave the oil in for at least two hours and then wash hair with shampoo and condition.

To learn more about the oil, click the links and learn about its goodness: 

https://www.betrendsetter.com/proven-benefits-of-mustard-oil-for-hair-and-skin/ 

https://stylesatlife.com/articles/mustard-oil-for-hair-growth/

According to one article, mustard seed oil has been used for 4000 years. Safe to say, mustard seed oil has stood the test of time. Don't expect any miracles though, growing hair or regrowing hair takes time.

https://www.naturallycurly.com/curlreading/curl-products/mustard-oil-for-hair-growth

Day 17: The secret to beautiful healthy hair will surprise you

Between You, Me and the Lamp Post

Day 17: The secret to beautiful healthy hair will surprise you

Whenever inspiration is in short supply, I do what I always do … I take a walk. Today that walk took me to the Bloor Mall and more specifically to Drug Market.

Wandering along the aisles, I’m always surprised at the number of hair care products: shampoos, conditioners, mousses, oils, etc. Over the years I have used a great number of them, and I can tell you with absolute certainty … none of them delivered on their promises.

Next, I looked at the magazines. One of them also focused on hair. How to get longer hair, stronger hair, straighter hair, curlier hair. Out of curiosity I paged through the magazine, found the hair advise section and looked at the recommended products for hair problems.

One thing immediately became clear, whoever wanted his or her hair longer, stronger, straighter or curlier better be prepared to pay a hefty price for it.

I couldn’t help but smile. I doubted that these products were any different than those on the shelves of Drug Market, promising a lot but delivering very little.

Now it so happens that I have a hair problem myself. After a lengthy illness, I have a lot less hair than I used to have. It’s not surprising really, during my illness I suffered pain, stress, lack of appetite and weight loss 10 kilos (20 lbs), all factors that impact hair, especially lack of appetite.

When someone is not eating right, or not eating enough, hair is one of the things that get affected. The hair no longer receives the vitamins and minerals it needs and more importantly, it no longer gets proteins. The result, hair breaks and/or falls out.

When I went looking for a remedy to whip my hair back into shape, I didn’t look at any pills or creams, or any beauty product that promised me miracles, I consulted Mother Nature. Or rather, I turned to Google and researched what Mother Nature had to offer.

As it turns out, the best thing for hair was right in my fridge and costs only a few cents … an onion. According to experts, red onion juice is the best thing for hair.

First-time users are advised to peel and chop one or two onions into pieces and boil them in water for twenty minutes. Remove the onion pieces and let the water cool. Put the water in a bottle and sprints all over the scalp, apply the water with a soft brush, or pour the water all over the scalp.

If the smell doesn’t bother you, you can also use pure onion juice. For this method put on or two onions in a blender. Pour the mixture through a cheesecloth or other fine material and sprits the juice over the scalp or apply with a brush.

Whichever method you prefer, you can leave the onion juice (pure or diluted) on your hair for twenty minutes (if you’re in a hurry) or two hours if you have the time. Afterward shampoo and condition as usual.

There you have it. According to the experts, you don’t need expensive concoctions to prevent hair breakage, to regrow hair, or to just keep your hair in top condition. An onion will do better than anything you buy in the store.

Personally, I’m going to try it tomorrow and I’ll keep you updated on my hair’s progress. Don’t expect miracles though. All the articles I’ve read state if you use onion juice twice or three times a week, it may take four to six weeks to give results.

Day 30: About aging

My Project: 365 Creative Writing Prompts

Day 30: About aging

Some people age gracefully while others just can’t accept their age. I noticed a post from a woman on LinkedIn yesterday, let’s call her Ivy, who immediately put my back up. I’m not sure whether it was the look of her or the way she was posing but she's  She’s clearly in her late 50s but she pretends to be 21. 

While I have nothing against people dressing young, there is a difference between dressing fashionable and dressing slutty. The way Ivy was dressed and posed the message was clear … come and get it, boys, I’m available. At her age, this is just ridiculous.

Other than her outfit, her hair bothered me even more. It was either a cheap wig, terrible extensions, or if it was real, badly in need of a cut and deep conditioning. Not only was it long and straggly, it was bleached to the point that it is more yellow than blond.

Then I noticed her name and instantly recognized it. A couple of years ago I responded to a Craigslist ad that asked for a freelance writer. The client, Ivy, sent me an email stating that she wanted descriptions for her products. 

Okay, well, she was at the right address for that with me.

She gave me a long list of what she wanted and what should be avoided. I didn’t agree with her philosophy but okay, if that’s what she wanted, I could work with that.

What Ivy didn’t mention was payment. When I brought up the subject she seemed surprised … payment? Yes, payment Ivy, you might have heard of it, it’s a popular way of reimbursing people for their services.

Ivy was not keen on discussing the subject, but having been around the block a few times, I wasn’t going to do any work until we had an agreement on payment. Eventually, she suggested that she would ‘pay’ me with a couple of free samples of her products.

That was not acceptable to me. I can’t pay my bills or go shopping with free samples. Stores only accept money, in one form or another, so I wanted to be paid in money too. Ivy didn't agree, she thought that one or two samples was more than enough for a dozen or so product descriptions.

From what I could see, Ivy is now recruiting for a business venture, yes, another one. She dipped her toe in several businesses, even calls herself president of company XXX, but it’s all baloney. None of her ideas get off the ground.

In a way, it doesn’t surprise me. One: looking the way she does, nobody is going to take her seriously. Two: she needs to pay her people. If she treats others the way she treated me, it’s no wonder nobody is willing to work for her.

www.connymanero.weebly.com

Alia Aliia Nasyrova - aka the real Rapunzel

Yesterday the media ran a story on Alia Aliia Nasyrova, nicknamed ‘The Real Rapunzel’. Her hair apparently is 2 meters long and weigh approximately 2 kg.

While some people admired her commitment, others commented that it must be quite a burden living with such long and heavy hair, while others still were of the opinion that she should donate her hair to cancer patients.

This last statement makes me so mad. I was a cancer patient myself and if anyone had asked me if I would want someone to cut their hair to benefit me, I would have said … ABSOLUTELY NOT!

Let me say this though ...

Nobody can donate anything to a cancer patient. At best, someone can donate hair to a wig-making institution such as Locks of Love, and there it gets tricky.

A few years ago I heard that Locks of Love was a scam, that they sold the hair they received to Hollywood and Europe. I decided to get to the bottom of this claim and wrote to Locks of Love.

I received an email back in which the writer confirmed that this is true, the hair received does get sold.

The writer stated that 70% of all hair received was useless and got discarded. It was either too short or chemical treated. Hair that has been permed or color treated is unsuitable for wig making.

The writer stated that a lot of ponytails just don’t contain enough hair to make a wig and combining several ponytails is not an option.

The 30% that is useable gets sold to film studios in Hollywood and theaters in Europe. Where the money goes to is anyone's guess.

The writer went on to say that cancer patients never qualify for a wig donation on grounds that after their chemo treatment, their own hair grows back.

www.connymanero.weebly.com

Take a cold shower

A few years ago, the chiller in our condo building packed up, and as a result we had no air-conditioning during a heat wave that had Toronto sweltering in a temperature of 45 degrees C (113 degrees F).

Tempers flared, residents were fainting in their units and a woman with heart problems came close to dying. 

When the temperature dropped to 35 degrees C (95 degrees F) everyone heaved a sigh of relief.  It was still hot, but noticeably cooler than the past three days.

All in all, the building was without air-conditioning for 18 days and when the cool air was finally restored, everyone was so happy they almost organized a party.

For the past four days we’ve had another problem … now the boiler is temperamental.  We have heat in our units, but no hot water.

What comes out of the taps is at best tepid water.  Doing the dishes is not such a problem, we can boil water in a pot and transfer it to the sink to get everything clean and grease free.  

The real problem is showering in the morning.

I don’t know about you, but I’m not a fan of cold showers.  Especially not now, in winter.  When that blast of cold water hit me yesterday, I nearly jumped out of my skin and the scream that echoed through the bathroom would have made a soprano jealous.

Later on I looked up if there are any health benefits to a cold shower.  Apparently there are quite a few, but I’ll give you my take on them.

Strengthens Immunity – My immune system is just fine thank you.  And if I get a cold or the flu once a year, that’s beneficial to my body as it gives me antibodies.

Better blood circulation – No problem there.  My blood goes round and round without stopping or even pausing.

Regulates temperature – This makes me feel like I should come with a thermostat.

Promotes Weight Loss / Increases Metabolism – If I lose any more weight, I’m going to resemble an ATM card.

Alleviates Depression – I’m not depressed.  I might feel down from time to time, but not to the point that I would call it a depression.

Deepens Breathing – Just exactly how deep do you want me to breath, down to my toes?

Keeps Skin and Hair Healthy – Washing my hair with cold water gave me a headache, and my skin looked like I was about to sprout feathers. 

Increases Energy and Wellbeing – Please, I have so much energy I resemble a ball in a pinball machine. 

Increases Hormone Production – the writer of the website writes “Cold water showers have the ability to increase hormone production and activity by giving the body’s glands a boost. For example, cold showers can be of great benefit to the reproductive system when trying to conceive a child”.

That’s it, I want my hot water back.  Should I find myself pregnant, this pinball machine is going to go tilt. 

Every action has a reaction

It’s hard being a cat sometimes, especially if you share a house with other cats.

Even though there are three perfectly good baskets around, whenever there’s a box available Chanel, Mickey, Charlotte and Gabriel will take turns curling up in it.  But sometimes one of them overstays his welcome.  In that case patience goes out the window and it’s time for a little action.

While Gabriel was sleeping in a cardboard box today, Mickey did just that.  He positioned himself close to where Gabriel and looked at him.  Make that, stared at him.  He stared and stared and just when I thought he was about to give up, he stared some more.

Gabriel wasn’t bothered.  Mickey could stare all he wanted, Gabe wasn’t moving.  So what did Mickey do … he bit Gabriel’s leg.  He lowered his head, nuzzled his nose into Gabriel’s long hair, but instead of grooming him, he took a bite.

As planned, this action had a reaction.  Unfortunately Mickey hadn’t thought this one through though.  Yes, Gabriel vacated the box, but Mickey couldn’t immediately take possession of it.  First he had to deal with a mouthful of hair.  That comes of it when you bite a longhaired cat.

Do Mickey and Gabriel fight?  Neih, they’re the best of friends, always have been.

In general it wasn’t Mickey’s day today.  This morning I couldn’t find him.  I wasn’t really worried because I had seen him some five minutes before, so I figured he was probably sleeping somewhere.

While waiting for Mick to resurface I decided to make the beds.  I started with Dieter’s bed, grabbed hold of the duvet and flung it on the floor.  There Mickey was, with some dumb look on his face like “What the hell happened?” 

Did he get up?  If you think he did, you don’t know Mickey very well.  He put his head down and went right back to sleep.  Okay, I would come back later.  Much later.

I moved on to my bed.  Once again I grabbed the duvet and threw it off the bed.  I heard a “clonk”.  That was strange, duvets go down softly, they don’t go clonk.  This time I had interrupted Charlotte’s sleep.  She slunk from under the duvet (that was now in a heap on the floor) clearly not impressed.  She gave me a look that said “What’d do that for?”

This was clearly a no win situation for me.  So I left the beds alone and went to do the dishes instead.  Much safer for everyone.