If it sounds like a lawyer and acts like a lawyer ...

Parents often complain that their children watch too much TV.  They think this is a waste of time.  I beg to differ.  After learning of my experience of last Wednesday, parents might urge their kids to watch more TV.

I recently walked past a store displaying their spring collection.  I saw turquoise and a salmon colored tops on the mannequin and it was love at first sight.  They looked so fresh and cheerful.

I went inside, found my size and paid. 

A smart person would have tried the tops on, but there was no time for that.  My bowling league started in less than ten minutes and I didn’t have a minute to lose.

Back home I noticed that I should have tried the tops on.  Even though they fitted perfectly, they were so see through I couldn’t possibly wear them in public.  I had no option but to take them back.

When I tried to return the tops, I was in for a surprise … the store didn’t believe in giving me my money back, I could only get store credit.

I didn’t believe in store credit, I wanted to money back and I was going to get it if I had to move heaven and earth.

I asked to speak to the manager, who was just as uncooperative as the sales girl.

“Ma’am, it says so right here on the receipt,” the manager said.  “We do not accept returns.”

Of course, I hadn’t seen that.  I need glasses to see anything that’s printed and I didn’t have my glasses with me at the time.

I was not going to be defeated though.  Time to pull out the big guns.  Years of watching legal shows on TV had thought me that if one speaks with conviction, one is taken seriously.  So I gave it my best shot.

I reminded the store manager that the sales clerk had failed to draw my attention to the fact that items were non-refundable, only exchangeable.

“But it’s printed on the receipt,” the sales manager reminded me.

“But I’m half blind,” I said.  “I can’t see without my glasses.  I can see far, but nothing up close.  As such, this specification should have been verbally communicated to me.”

I went on rattling off a few paragraphs and sections of the law book.  You know … paragraph 28 section 21 states that in the event …” etc etc. 

I sounded like a lawyer, I acted like a lawyer and I did so with aplomb.

Whether the store manager saw my point or he wanted me to shut up I’ll never know, but I walked out of that store with a full refund. 

Who said TV isn’t educational?